And so, a couple of weeks ago, to Northallerton, North Yorkshire, or more specifically Aindersby Steeple, and a pub called the Wellington Heifer.

Why there? Well, certainly not because it’s in the heart of our unlamented former PM, Rishi Sunak’s, constituency. We came upon the Wellington Heifer by chance back in May, when we were down in Norfolk with family. Sticking a pin in the map half way between there and home gave us Northallerton, and we stopped off for the one night at what turned out to be pretty much the perfect expression of an English country pub: good food, wine, beer and service in a cosy and not too ersatz setting.

So when looking to decompress for a few days recently, we decided to book 3 nights this time, and take the train – Northallerton’s on the main line, and the expresses stop there, so easy to reach from Edinburgh in a couple of hours.

What did we do? Not much. Pootled round Northallerton, Aindersby Steeple and Bedale. Took the bus. Went on the Wensleydale Railway. Ate and drank. And, in my case, completely disconnected from the grid (Alison kept her phone on in case of emergencies).

What did I learn from three nights of Skynet-free existence?

1. It boosts creativity

I already knew this from previous times where I’ve disconnected – although, to be honest, it’s hard to know how much it’s about that and how much it’s about being on holiday! All the same, I found myself scribbling down ideas for poems/song lyrics in the dark two nights running, which doesn’t often happen. Remains to be seen whether they’re any good, of course.

2. I didn’t miss Bluesky, and it didn’t miss me

I left Twitter not because it’s owned by a guy who gives every appearance of being a bit of a dick: I have no idea whether the owner of Bluesky is less so, but maybe just less well known. However, it was suggested to me as a less toxic environment, and so it proved to be.

However, it wasn’t long before various randoms started following me with obvious agendas, mainly around me paying for pictures of them with their clothes off. Meantime, I seemed to have ended up in a pro-Democrat echo chamber, which I suspect is one whole lot better than ending up in a pro-Republican echo chamber. I mean, I’m as keen as the next man that the orange nutter doesn’t get another go at blowing up the world, but, frankly, the minutiae of wee Scotland’s politics don’t interest me that much, so it’s unlikely that those of the US of A would either.

I think it’s the format of these types of social media that turns me off: just a constant, rolling stream of people posting stuff. Facebook’s not great but of the 320 ‘friends’ I have on it, a sizeable proportion of them are actual friends (or at the very least, ex-colleagues I’m kindly disposed to) in what passes for real life these days.

I posted just before going off-grid about going off-grid on Bluesky and Facebook. On the former, no one paid the post the slightest heed. At least I got a few upturned thumbs on FB.

3. I really, really, like reading

I had two books with me in Yorkshire: Daphne du Maurier’s novel Rebecca, and what if, by Randall Munroe, creator of xkcd. I enjoyed reading both (although I didn’t get either finished, and progress has slowed since then) and felt I could have spent even longer doing so quite happily. Du Maurier in particular is a hell of a writer – a splendidly twisted soul.

4. I must have a stronger accent than I thought

Obviously, the number of people I spoke to in the course of a three night stay wasn’t statistically significant, but I was surprised at how there seemed to be communication difficulties with quite a few of them. Traditionally Scots have been pretty well understood in the North of England, and I wouldn’t have thought my accent was that strong to start with.

Maybe it’s just a general trend, encouraged by t’internet, towards everyone speaking a much more homogeneous form these days. Although, given that I live in South Edinburgh, that may just be an impression, as there are a lot of overseas students in the mix. Dunno. Felt a bit weird though.

5. I use Google to fact check a lot

There were a lot of times I thought, ‘Is that right?’ Or, ‘Is s/he still actually alive?’ Or even,

‘What’s their name again?’

If you’re connected up to Skynet, of course, it can tell you anything about anything, whilst harvesting information about what you’re interested in in the process. If you’re not, you just have to put up with not absolutely knowing something. I kind of feel that should be more okay than it is.

6. Errrr…

7. That’s it, really

What, were you expecting some ground-breaking ten or twelve point list? I mean, it was only three nights. I really didn’t miss anything much, not being connected: when I reconnected, there were a couple of emails each on my different addresses, about four Facebook messages and a gazillion notifications about who had posted what cat picture. A couple of WhatsApps.

Going forward, I think I’ll be ending the Bluesky experiment and sticking with Facebook as my only social media from here on in. Somewhat counterintuitively, I’ll probably put it on my phone but with the notifications turned off, as I’ve found myself turning on the laptop just to check on FB, which seems like a bit of a waste of time and energy, really.

At the same time, I really hate reading stuff on my phone. I have to take my glasses off and peer at the wee screen. I’m hoping that annoyance will mean I spend the absolute minimum time doing so.

In truth, the thing I love my mobile phone most for is the ability to take photos then and there, as I hope the above demonstrates (I used the phone in flight mode). They’re not the greatest photos in the world, but they capture a moment. At the same time, of course, there’s the balance – or bargain, if you will – to be struck between just living in the moment and trusting to your memory, taking in the sights, sounds and smells around you then and there, and freezing it into a single, 2D image.

Oh, that and being able to carry around a sizeable record collection in a pocket-sized container. Especially on the bus, to block out other people’s conversations/record collections which they magnanimously choose to share with the rest of us without head- or earphones.

Speaking of music, a word from our sponsors: my new acoustic EP, ‘All My Pretty Ones,’ is available for pre-order on Bandcamp now. Here’s a couple of the tracks on it: